I have very soft pubic hair. I know what you’re thinking, some people hit the jackpot, but I wasn’t born with the genetic makeup to assure I’d one day have a silky bush.  My secret? I started using Fur Oil.

Fur Oil is a conditioning beauty oil explicitly designed for, well, pubes. Developed by sisters Emily and Laura Schubert, along with co-founder Lillian Tung, the oil promises to minimize ingrowns and soften hairs. Fur products, which include a Stubble Cream, a Silk Scrub and an Ingrown Concentrate, in addition to their signature oil are 100 percent natural, vegan, and cruelty-free.  

My Fur Oil arrives quickly and with little fanfare. I was expecting a grander presentation, but it simply comes wrapped tightly in bubble wrap in a small cardboard box, packed along with a postcard, which reads: Our brand was founded by women who believe in straight-forward, beautiful care for every part of the body for every body. Fur products are formulated directly with dermatologists and gynecologists to make sure they are safe and effective for everyone.

Unboxing the tiny round tincture I’m pleased that if nothing else, the bottle will look cool on my bathroom vanity. And speaking of vanity, I want shinier pubes so I shower right away. I shave my bikini line as normal, then apply the oil while my skin is still slightly damp. Fur Oil is best applied on clean skin and should be used every day as part of your beauty regimen for best results. The oil gives off a fresh, spa-like smell with hints of tea tree oil, lavender, and lemon that dissipates quickly. At first, I worry that the mintiness of the tea tree may burn (If you’ve ever had the unfortunate experience of touching your junk after handling hot sauce or toothpaste, you know what I mean.). I am happy to report that this is not the case; the oil feels light and gives me zero unwanted tingles.

The ingredient list is entirely natural and made from a mix of nine oils. Fur’s website identified the four “key ingredients” as Grape Seed Oil, Jojoba Oil, Clary Sage Oil, and Tea Tree Oil. The four powerhouse ingredients absorb quickly, condition skin, soothe redness and irritation with natural antibacterials, and help prevent ingrowns with their antimicrobial properties.

After one use, my pubic hair feels soft and has a sheen to it.  It’s not like my pubic hair looked particularly dull in the past. (Today in: Sentences I’d never thought I’d write.) But after using Fur, it has a healthy shimmer underneath my harsh bathroom light. I’m so happy with this I decided to try it on my eyebrows too. Fur’s website says that the oil is “for everywhere hair meets skin” so I feel safe in putting the oil close to my eyes (which is only right, considering I just layered it on my genitals). My eyebrows look shiny and perfectly undone without being greasy. In short, I love the effect.

After telling him he has to answer my questions for the sake of honest journalism, my partner confirms that yes, my eyebrows look “good” and that my pubes feel soft.

I’ve used Fur on my pubic hair, eyebrows, and the ends of my hair every day since. My bikini line is staying smoother for longer and my split ends look shiny and sealed.

The only downside is the cost. I have lived a (relatively) long life with product-free pubes and it seems like a big leap to start spending $28 dollars for a two-week 14 milliliter supply. Fur also offers a larger 76-milliliter bottle for $46 that is said to last 6 months and is a much smarter buy.

But will I order Fur Oil again? Furk yea.

Before becoming a renowned cartoonist, Tony Millionaire struggled to find any work at all. But after quitting a middling dishwashing job, he had an epiphany. He decided to go door-to-door in wealthy neighborhoods drawing the manicured mansions to sell to the people who lived there, earning a living one $25 piece at a time. In the winter, though, the drawing work dried up and Millionaire had to scramble to find new income, eventually landing a job as a demolition man.

“The people who had money to spend on drawings lived in big, fancy houses,” recalls Millionaire, now a nationally syndicated cartoonist. “If you have a nice, big old house, the garden comes in perfectly, the roof is fixed, the flowers are coming in nicely. How do you put a period on that? You have somebody draw a picture of it. But you can’t really do that in winter. So, I had to find a job in construction. I used to do the demolition inside houses. I’d tear them down in winter and draw them in summer.”

The grueling grind would become a theme in Millionaire’s professional life. But it was also the path that led him to his greatest creative successes. Down and out, freshly single and a self-identified alcoholic, Millionaire found himself one night at his local bar in New York City, a place called 612. Dejected, he began drawing a big-eyed suicidal bird. It was the birth of his most famous character, Drinky Crow.

“I was sad, depressed, and broken-hearted,” says Millionaire. “I went down to the bar, and I started drawing this depressed little crow blowing his brains out. And the bartender looked over at me and said, ‘Oh, you draw comics?’ I said, ‘Kind of.’ And he said, ‘Draw me a comic, and I’ll give you a beer.’ And I thought, ‘Good God, I’ve got a fucking job. This will get me through the winter.’”

Eventually, more customers in the bar began drawing crows blowing their brains out,but Millionaire remained the sole recipient of beer as payment. Drinky Crows ended up on the bathroom stalls and the walls of the bar. And the owner of 612 loved it. Drinky Crow was the watering hole’s new mascot. And soon, Millionaire didn’t have to draw houses for rich people anymore.

You could say Millionaire was fated to be a cartoonist. Despite a lifestyle and orientation to the world that resembled more skid row than MOMA, art remained thick in Millionaire’s blood. His grandfather and grandmother were professional artists, as was his mother and father. And Millionaire credits their talent and encouragement for shaping his confidence.

“I picked up a crayon and started scribbling and never stopped,” he recalls. “At three, I drew an elephant, and my mother said it was the greatest thing she’d ever seen. She continued to convince me I was a great artist and that’s why I am a great artist.”

At 10, Millionaire told his mother he wanted to be a commercial artist. But she had higher hopes for her progeny.

“She said, ‘You’re going to go to art school, take fine art, learn to draw and learn to paint,’” Millionaire says. “She said, ‘Don’t ever worry about your career, just keep working.’”

As a result, Millionaire has established himself as one of the most prolific cartoonists working today. He’s a craftsman. He doesn’t doodle. Rather, he gets an idea for a strip and bangs it out, creating deep, rich panels with expressive, eye-catching characters. He’s a student of the Sunday papers of the ‘30s and ‘40s, an art form that has all but dried up of late due to vast newspaper cutbacks.

This year, though, he relaunched his popular strip “Maakies”, which originally ran from 1994-2016, online, and has used Instagram to get his work back out in the world. Now he has more readers than ever. His comics are drawn with his lush style and quick wit. But most of all, people love the crass, real-life content — the gut-punch lines — like a crow at a bar with X’s for eyes talking about wanting ice cubes in his Scotch, or a character coming out of jail “impregnated” in 4 places in his head, or another character decapitated.

Millionaire likes to drink. He says he can’t draw without it. He loves drinking and doesn’t shy away from it, subscribing to the Rat Pack ethic that says if you don’t drink, then the moment you wake up is the highlight of the day, and it’s all downhill from there. But, unlike most alcoholics, Millionaire has been able to function both creatively and professionally while drinking— a reality, he underscores, that does not work for most.

“When I was young,” he says, “I learned how to be very drunk. Now that I’m older, I’ve learned to be a relaxed alcoholic and I only drink beer. For me, it works. I sit at night and drink and draw. I can’t draw sober, I’m too aware of everything. Everything’s too serious. So, I drink some beer and feel fine and off I go until 6 or 7 in the morning.”

Today, many of Millionaire’s fans sport Drinky Crow tattoos. Drinky Crow even had his own cartoon show. Millionaire has had many books published to go along with his seemingly endless number of strips. He’s an enterprise, and it was a fortune both destined to happen and that was nearly impossible to come to fruition.

“I can’t stop it,” Millionaire says of his production. “I don’t have a choice. To me, it comes down to what the job requires. That’s why I love my comics. I can draw whatever I want. I don’t sketch, most artists sketch. I get bored doing that. I want my pen to do a thing that I’m planning on. But that just comes from drawing too many fucking houses.”