I have very soft pubic hair. I know what you’re thinking, some people hit the jackpot, but I wasn’t born with the genetic makeup to assure I’d one day have a silky bush.  My secret? I started using Fur Oil.

Fur Oil is a conditioning beauty oil explicitly designed for, well, pubes. Developed by sisters Emily and Laura Schubert, along with co-founder Lillian Tung, the oil promises to minimize ingrowns and soften hairs. Fur products, which include a Stubble Cream, a Silk Scrub and an Ingrown Concentrate, in addition to their signature oil are 100 percent natural, vegan, and cruelty-free.  

My Fur Oil arrives quickly and with little fanfare. I was expecting a grander presentation, but it simply comes wrapped tightly in bubble wrap in a small cardboard box, packed along with a postcard, which reads: Our brand was founded by women who believe in straight-forward, beautiful care for every part of the body for every body. Fur products are formulated directly with dermatologists and gynecologists to make sure they are safe and effective for everyone.

Unboxing the tiny round tincture I’m pleased that if nothing else, the bottle will look cool on my bathroom vanity. And speaking of vanity, I want shinier pubes so I shower right away. I shave my bikini line as normal, then apply the oil while my skin is still slightly damp. Fur Oil is best applied on clean skin and should be used every day as part of your beauty regimen for best results. The oil gives off a fresh, spa-like smell with hints of tea tree oil, lavender, and lemon that dissipates quickly. At first, I worry that the mintiness of the tea tree may burn (If you’ve ever had the unfortunate experience of touching your junk after handling hot sauce or toothpaste, you know what I mean.). I am happy to report that this is not the case; the oil feels light and gives me zero unwanted tingles.

The ingredient list is entirely natural and made from a mix of nine oils. Fur’s website identified the four “key ingredients” as Grape Seed Oil, Jojoba Oil, Clary Sage Oil, and Tea Tree Oil. The four powerhouse ingredients absorb quickly, condition skin, soothe redness and irritation with natural antibacterials, and help prevent ingrowns with their antimicrobial properties.

After one use, my pubic hair feels soft and has a sheen to it.  It’s not like my pubic hair looked particularly dull in the past. (Today in: Sentences I’d never thought I’d write.) But after using Fur, it has a healthy shimmer underneath my harsh bathroom light. I’m so happy with this I decided to try it on my eyebrows too. Fur’s website says that the oil is “for everywhere hair meets skin” so I feel safe in putting the oil close to my eyes (which is only right, considering I just layered it on my genitals). My eyebrows look shiny and perfectly undone without being greasy. In short, I love the effect.

After telling him he has to answer my questions for the sake of honest journalism, my partner confirms that yes, my eyebrows look “good” and that my pubes feel soft.

I’ve used Fur on my pubic hair, eyebrows, and the ends of my hair every day since. My bikini line is staying smoother for longer and my split ends look shiny and sealed.

The only downside is the cost. I have lived a (relatively) long life with product-free pubes and it seems like a big leap to start spending $28 dollars for a two-week 14 milliliter supply. Fur also offers a larger 76-milliliter bottle for $46 that is said to last 6 months and is a much smarter buy.

But will I order Fur Oil again? Furk yea.

In my local Portland coffee shop recently, the barista asked if I wanted to add a few drops of CBD to my Americano. He spoke in the same flat affect usually reserved for “Room for cream?” Always curious to try anything that promises to make me feel “different,” I ponied up the extra three bucks bringing my total to 2.5 times its normal price.

The CBD itself was tasteless and left a light oily film on the top of my coffee, which was not unpleasant (it reminded me of the oily drops on the surface of hot chocolate sold at ice skating rinks). What followed was one of the most clear-headed and productive writing days I’ve had in months.

For the uninitiated, CBD (Cannabidiol) is one of over 100 chemical compounds which comprise the marijuana plant. The compound most commonly associated with marijuana is THC (Tetrahydrocannabinol) and THC is what gets people high. Because CBD won’t get you stoned, it’s an intriguing option for anyone who is seeking relief from a myriad of symptoms but is uninterested in a lofty conversation about how the fuck tunnels are actually built…man.

I recognize that I am particularly susceptible to psychosomatic effects: I once drank salad dressing mixed with ketchup and thought I was drunk. To make sure the effects I was feeling from the CBD coffee were not in my head, in the figurative sense, I corroborated my experience with other CBD coffee enthusiasts, and spoke with Dr. Benjamin Caplan and Brooke Alpert, RD and licensed holistic cannabis practitioner, who is also New York City-based author of “The Sugar Detox.”

Generally speaking, for most people taking CBD, it seems to have a calming effect,” Caplan founder of the CED Foundation says, “It doesn’t seem to counteract other effects of caffeine.

Caplan, explained further, “there is literature supporting CBD’s action as a strong anti-inflammatory agent; it can help inhibit some of the major cascades of inflammatory cells, essentially muting components of the body’s alarm system. There is also evidence that, for some patients, CBD can reduce seizures, quell pain from arthritis and muscle spasm, reduce nausea, quiet nerve pains, and help lower anxiety. With consistent use and informed consumption, [CBD] has effect as an antineoplastic agent, supporting a cell’s ability to detect faulty or cancerous activity, and promote its self-destruction.”

Alpert says, “in my practice and in the research, 10 milligrams tends to be the sweet spot for most people to feel a positive effect from CBD.”

In addition to speaking with Caplan and Alpert, I wanted to glean multiple experiences from the general public to weigh in on the effectiveness of CBD in our daily lives — since you know, I have the ability to cop a buzz from salad dressing.

Before discovering the CBD coffee fusion, Emma Stapp had cut coffee entirely, feeling that it worsened her anxiety. “I truly love the taste and the ritual of [coffee], and though I’d try anything to ‘cure’ my angst, abstaining from coffee also didn’t seem like the forever solution. Adding CBD to my coffee seems to not only take the edge off my caffeine jitters and allow me to keep coffee in my life, but it also set the stage for a calmer day ahead.” She now uses CBD to combat everything from crippling panic attacks to first date jitters.

Stapp has been in therapy for over 14 years and has tried a variety of prescription medications, acupuncture, massage, Kava, meditation, yoga, running, mindfulness techniques, and dietary changes to manage her anxiety. CBD is now her preferred method for anxiety relief thanks to her newly discovered coffee and CBD ritual each morning.

“Both CBD and caffeine are known to interact with our natural cannabinoid system, boosting certain aspects, such as attention and focus, while, subduing other neurotransmitter systems,” Caplan tells me.  “Some animal data has shown us that cannabinoids, including CBD can interact with animal memory tasks. When caffeine has been studied alongside CBD, it has been shown to have a protective effect on memory.”

John*, a male in his 30s, says CBD in his morning cup of coffee makes his work stress more manageable. He drinks a CBD coffee and almost immediately experiences a calming effect. He notices he sweats less on his commute, which is a symptom of his easing anxiety.

Elena* found CBD coffee at a coffee shop in the West Village of New York City, and now brews her own at home each morning before heading to work. She notices a clearer head at the office, sustained energy, and an easier time focusing on complex tasks.

“I recently went off anxiety medicine I’ve been on since I was 12,” Elena told me.  

CBD has been a big part of that transition. It makes a noticeable difference for me and I’m much more comfortable taking it than a pharmaceutical that has all kinds of side effects.

Realizing that my brain loves the way I feel from CBD coffee but my wallet does not, I went online and purchased the exact same unflavored CBD tincture that my coffee shop uses (the brand is Gron) for $50. Now I add it to my coffee at home whenever I remember, which is seldom, because my brain doesn’t function well without coffee. A real catch-22. At least the bottle looks cool on my counter.

Isabelle Kohn, also known as “Dear Ibby” often fields questions such as, “Dear Ibby, The guy I’m seeing is so into anal, but I hate it. What should I do?” to “Dear Ibby, All I want to do is wear my girlfriend’s clothes while we fuck …” and even “Dear Ibby, Can I tighten my vagina? Do kegels really work?”

Kohn’s sex advice column defies the norm as it’s informative, thoughtful, and often comical.

It was meant to be humorous and helpful at the same time. So much sex information is conveyed with seriousness or alarm. I felt like a more lighthearted approach might make it easier for people to connect with what is often a difficult and confusing topic.

Kohn explained

Sex education is imperative to gaining the knowledge necessary to make healthy decisions about sex and sexuality. It contributes to fostering healthy relationships and managing personal sexual health. Unfortunately, only 24 states and the District of Columbia require sex education. Of those 24, only eight mention consent or sexual assault and according to a study done by Public Religion Research Institute on 12 percent mention same-sex relationships.It’s no wonder that so many adults seek out candid advice from knowledgeable women like Isabelle Kohn.

Isabelle Kohn is a journalist, editor, sex educator, sex coach, and the ingenious mind behind the advice column, “Dear Ibby.” “Dear Ibby” was a unique way of allowing adults who didn’t know whom or how to ask for advice to ask questions about their bodies and desires, or their partner’s. “I’m deeply interested in the mind-body connection, the transformative power of kink, and giving voices to more marginalized expressions of sexuality,” Kohn told us. For readers, the advice column was an affirmation that their questions or concerns were valid and that they were not alone in feeling naive to certain aspects of sexuality, consent, and dating.

Kohn quit doing “Dear Ibby” for Rooster Magazine, but has continued her work as a sex educator. Kohn and Bryn Roberts have started sex-ed pop-up dinners called “Eating Out” where they procure a house to host an intimate, family-style meal. “Oh my god, they’re so fun,” Kohn emphasized. “It’s a hybrid sex-ed pop-up dinner where we plan the menus around various themes like BDSM, aphrodisiacs, anal sex — any sexual topic can be made into a pop-up event, really.” Roberts makes a nutritarian meal from foods chosen specifically for how they might enhance a sexual or sensual situation. During dinner, the health benefits of the meal are discussed and afterwards a workshop around the dinner theme is taught by an expert in that field. A recent BDSM brunch included a spanking and impact play demonstration by Kohn’s mentor, Jamila Dawson, an interdisciplinary sex therapist. “The whole thing is meant to facilitate discussion and help sex-positive and sexually curious people build community and make connections. It’s very educational, but it’s also an entirely novel way to consume sex-positive information,” Kohn explained.

Kohn has also created a safe space for her orgasm classes in the same truly affirming and supportive atmosphere. These classes are open to all genders and orientations, and are completely no contact — with yourself or others. “We go over anatomy, communication, masturbation, self-empowerment, practical skills, toys, and the cultural context in which orgasms take place,” Kohn explains. Although she would like to do more hands-on training one day, these classes are strictly educational.

Creating a safe space for sexual understanding and having instruction that is inclusive is important, Things like communication, consent, and self-empowerment are things everyone can benefit from, regardless of how they identify.

Kohn detailed, “It’s really helpful to learn about your own body and bodies that are different from your own. The more you know, the more effective communication and consent you can have, and the more passionate and intimate an exchange can be. Everyone likes different things, so having a more diverse audience — especially one that feels open to discussing their own sexualities, preferences, and vulnerabilities, benefits everyone.”

“In general, the more diverse your classes can be in terms of gender, race, age, ability level, socioeconomic status, religion, and so on, the better and more valuable education you get.” Kohn explained by giving us a few examples, “There was one class I taught where a cis man had no idea that there was an internal portion to the clit.” Another time, “a femme person was totally floored that you could use cock rings to make someone with a penis last longer in bed,” and “There was another where a guy talked about how he never felt like he had the opportunity to give consent in sexual interactions.” These types of discoveries, and the fostering of open communication around healthy sexuality, are crucial to relationships that are guilt and shame-free.

Unfortunately, not all of those who come across the necessary work that Kohn does are as impressed, but she couldn’t care less. “I block them then never think about it again,” she says. Kohn’s confidence in her own expertise leaves no room for trolls. “The internet is full of idiots and people who get off on trying to make you feel like shit, and I don’t have time for that. If someone doesn’t know me or is clearly coming from a place of insecurity — which most people who troll you are — why would I care what they have to say?” Kohn has even gone as far as creating a handy guide on her Medium account called: “Be The Internet Troll You Wish to See in The World.”

Isabelle Kohn’s career as a sex educator has benefited so many. She has unapologetically written about topics like female sexual pain, which often goes unheard and ignored by their partners and the medical system. Along with Joan Price, a 74-year-old senior sex expert, she pressed the importance of senior sexuality — which gave us all less anxiety about old age and reminded us that “sex has no expiration date.” Whether it is her unique classes, her exceptional writing, or simply her knack for suggesting just the right sex toy you’re looking for, Kohn’s witty sex-positive voice is the kind of transformational cultural awareness necessary for a sexual revolution in the sea of naive or oppressive garbage. “Sex is not a one-size-fits-all game,”

Kohn explains,

It can’t be summed up in a listicle, or understood from a single class alone. There’s no such thing as universal “good sex” because “good sex” means something different for everyone. It’s a completely subjective, beautifully diverse, and constantly fluctuating thing. Navigating it in your own life is all about how to make things work for you, not what other people think works for them.